Diam

Bila marah
Baik diam
Dari teriak sampai pekak
Dari turut nafsu kalbu
Baik diam
Sebelum jadi luka
Sebelum hampa jadi celaka
Baik diam

Cause at the end

"Gigi awk cantik."

 

"Yeke?" Dan aku pun tersengih malu. 

"Tapi gusi awak hitam. Cuba tengok gusi saya pink je." 

Jarang betul nak puji betul betul. Yet, that's what I love about him. Cause at the end, 

"Awak wanita paling cantik dalam dunia."

 Amboi.

Now what?

Guess what? I've done with the internship. And life's still getting me no where.
HAHA.

Bittersweet

In less than two weeks I'll be leaving UKM. It is time for this little birdie (me) to come out from her comfy nest and take her first flight. How time flies huh. I was 19 five minutes ago and now I'm about to graduate?

I still remember the first day I step myself into college. Young and clumsy I was. And still is. Heh. Haih I wish I could freeze the time but there is nothing I could do right now rather than appreciate and seize every single moment that barely left. By far, uni life is the greatest time in my life hm yet confusing. You meet new people, you fall in love, having butterflies dancing in the stomach, get your heart broken, explore new things, level up yourself in so many ways, meet crazy friends and you get really close with them as you spend most of your time with friends.

O spite! O hell! I am so gonna missed this. I have to face the truth that this awesome chapter of my life is about to end real soon. Ah. Takut nak menghadapi dunia luar. It scares the hell outta me seeing my seniors still struggling seeking for jobs and even some have been unemployed nearly a year. It stresses me out too seeing my friends going for Master degree and I'm here trying to be as ignorant I could be. Some will be flying to UK laa apa laa. I tried not to care about how good and excellent my friends and other people are doing out there but its so hard. So freaking hard. I know its not healthy to keep comparing yourself with others but I can't help it.  Not to forget, the expectation from parents. Scary scary world it is. But, I think I'll be fine as long as I have my loved one around. Its good to know that you're not going through this alone.

Yes, maybe I haven't figure out yet what I'll be doing,but its normal lah kan (self motivation).Sometimes it takes a little extra time but I will get up there. I don't what is it, when and how but one day I will. Right now, I shall focus on my internship and we'll see how my life gets me from there.
Haih. Sometimes, it feels like I grow up too fast. Yeah, I should stop growing. I wanna be 21 forever or 16.
Yeah. I'm gonna go for my ugly cry now.

3.49am

Sedih. Stress. 

Kalau sedih, ubat dia shopping atau makan. Tak dapat shopping. Cuci mata je lah.

Kenapa kenapa Steve Madden kat sini mahal sangat. Kat website Aussie tu jauh jauh jauh murah kot!

Stress balik.

Randomly Random

Orang cakap, kalau sayang, tangan- tangankan. Saya nak tangan tangankan awak boleh?

Oh. Tadi pergi kedai gambar Ah Kong.  Mr Idontlikesambal nak ambil gambar berukuran pasport sebab rambut, janggut, misai dah tebas minggu lepas. Jadi, sekarang muka dia tengah hensem. Bukan senang nak dapat momen muka tengah hensem macamni, jadi haruslah diabadikan dalam foto.
Sewaktu dalam perjalanan, he said this.

 "Nanti masuk je kedai tu, awak terus ambik camera dulu." *suara serius*

 "Ha..Camera apa pulak ni? Awak nak saya ambil gambar awak ke?" 

 "Awak ni. Baru nak konon-konon kita nak pergi rompak kedai. " *stress*

 "Oh oh hohoho"  *pandang tingkap*

Macam mana hoi nak jadi partner in crime awak, kalau dapat partner selow camni.
Ha nah kita belanja sikit gambar ambil tadi.

Kacak seperti biasa.

P/S : Word of the day = GOAL!

Ini cinta

Dia

DIA
by unknown

"Semua asyik bertanya.
Kau pastikah? Betul-betul pasti kah? 

Aku naik menyampah. Memang aku tidak pasti apa yang Tuhan hidang untuk aku esok-esok.
Dan aku tidak pasti hidup berdua itu bagaimana sebenar-benarnya.
Tapi dalam tiap senyum , tiap gelak, tiap nangis, tiap marah, tiap sakit, tiap payah,
Aku mahu dengan dia.

Kalau hidup ini sial, biar aku lapah sial itu dengan dia.
Kalau aku jadi buruk, biar aku buruk dengan dia.
Kalau dia perengus, biar aku yang hadap rengus dia,
Aku tak pasti bahagia takat mana tapi dalam tiap-tiap tapak kaki aku memanjat mencarinya.

Aku pasti aku mahu dia ada."

Trust

Hari ini aku masih percaya sepenuh hati.
Tolong ya jangan beri sebab untuk aku berhenti.

Of an insane week

Minggu yang gila.

Hujung minggu, datang lekas. 

Beri ruang aku bernafas.

Gulai lemak kuning FTW!

I come to realize that whenever I went out for lunch and makan nasi campur, gulai lemak kuning would be the first lauk that I'll be looking for. Bagilah 100 jenis lauk pun, yang kuning-kuning jugak yang dicari. Lunch would never be lunch without gulai kuning. To whoever invented gulai lemak kuning, you had my heart.

Gulai lemak kuning for the win!
 Hm k lapar.

In need of a short and sweet escape.

I literally have no time! No time for myself not even to lay down and have a reading session with a nice cup of coffee. Not even a page!
I've been caught up with too many stuffs right now that I hardly breath and think wise. The play, thesis, presentation, assignments ....I'm about to pengsan right now. Haihh. Stressful sebab dalam hati meronta-ronta to get out awayyyyy from this place and breath. (Read: Beach) Please? Someone? Anywhere? No one? K. Tapi bila fikir balik, its not that stressful pun. Normal lah life as student. Cuma ada perasaaan yang rasa nak lari jauh jauh kejap  je kejap je dan tak nak fikir semua ni. Tak nak hadapi kenyataan yang kerja semakin banyak and dateline semakin hampir. Tu je.
Yet, to whom it may concern, I just want to let you know that no matter how much stuffs I'm copping with right now, no even a day passed without me thinking of you . God know how I miss you everyday (yaa being cheesy now bare with me )and how I wish you'd be here every time I get tense up so that u could sooth me up with your magic! Hihi. Ok done membebel. Back to work.

So it's holiday.

Hola! I' m at the middle of the semester break yeyeye. So cuti lah walaupun tak pergi mana mana pun. Been spending most of the day at home , to be specific in my room. Ye, it sounds pathetic but you haven't met my room yet! Its so dark so gloomy that you wanna stay in the bed your whole life.
Know what, I've promised myself that I'll be using the holiday to do my thesis but well...I lied. Haha. It kills me everytime I think about my thesis but still I do nothing about it. I guess I need something/someone to motivate/paksa/monitor/marah me. Haha yes I need you! (read: my boyfriend)
If you're reading this I pray for you to get well very very soon and let me be the only one yang boleh  mengada-ngada bila demam. Hihi.

And the last battle begins

Nothing much happened today. Life all dull without you cewah. Just went out to grab my late lunch and dinner. Had a little argument with a friend but we're okay now. So yah. tomorrow will be my very first day for the final semester. Setip kali first day untuk sem baru memang kena gelabah macam sekarang ni aaaaaaaa but since this is the very last sem for my BA, so I am allowed to freak out a little more than before. AAAAAAAAAAAAAA ok dah. So for this final sem, I hope I'll get to finish my thesis very very soon dengan cemerlangnya bukan main cukup syarat je and score the subjects of course. Also I hope by the end of this semester, I will find out or at least have the idea on what I'll be doing when I leave the uni later haha. Its hard to believe that I'm gonna leave my uni life, uni friends and all the routine in few months AAAAAAAAAAAAAA ok dah. But deep down somehow I hope all this will be finished sooner than expected haha. Apa benda sebenarnya yang kau cuba sampaikan ni. Nak habis degree cepat sebab nak kahwin letew. Eh.

Hello Mello

Been so long since the last time I wrote for nothing. Heh. Done so much writing all this while but only for the sake of the freaking assignments.
I used to write when I'm upset coz I like how writing can make you feel so powerful that you can write anything about those things that bother you. Like if you're mad with someone, obviously you can't bite off his/her head in real life but you can write about biting off his/her head. Isn't that awesome? Its like some kind of therapy I would say. So yea here I am deciding to write again. Just for this case, I'm not sad or in need of biting off someone's head. Haha. No. I am writing again because I am now the happiest girl in this planet and I want to share it with the whole universe how happy I am now.

I'm just happy.